Thursday, April 20, 2017
One of the things that aggravates the stew out of me is people, particularly the ladies, being unhappy about their weight or the way they look or their wrinkles. I have been up and down with my weight my whole life and have finally settled into loving myself. As I am. If I look back over pictures of myself over the years I was skinny, super skinny, really overweight, slightly overweight or pleasantly plump. One thing is constant in my weight struggles and my photos-there is one way I look when I am doing some exercise throughout the week, maybe some walking or running or whatever I can manage. It's kinda like my balance weight. If I am heavier or skinnier I have to do something dramatic to reach that size. Like have a baby, or starve myself to death. At my thinnest, I felt terrible most of the time. I was depriving myself and it can almost become an addiction. The bottom line is that God made some of us small and some of us big and some of us pear shaped and some of us round and some thin. Same with men.
My youngest daughter is very thin. The kids at school tell her she is anorexic and too thin. First of all, that isn't even something to joke about because one of my daughters has walked that path and it is not a choice. Anorexia and Bulimia are diseases and not something to be joked about. My youngest daughter is just naturally thin. So what society is telling us is you are a fatty or you are too thin. Nobody walks up to you and says you are just perfect. Well I know some people who do and I certainly try to but most people don't. We have to stop body shaming each other. Maybe someone gained weight because they were stressed. Maybe someone lost weight because they are so stressed they can't eat. And we have the gaul to tell them how good they look? You look so great on the outside while you are crumbling on the inside?! Stop. Just stop. God made us each to be a certain size barring any crazy effort either way. So let's all spend some time building each other up rather than tearing each other down. And let's learn to love ourselves. There are people who love fluffy girls and people who like thin boys and people who like tall girls or short boys or green eyes or brown hair or the list goes on. There is a lid for every pot. So let's quit picking ourselves apart and start building ourselves up to be the great creations that we are. Some people can eat a whole pie and not gain a pound and I can eat a bite and gain 5. It's just the way I am made. And I naturally have a double chin no matter how thin I am. So I have decided that leaving a double chin out of a picture is like leaving a child out of a family photo. So embrace it and flaunt your flaws! Be flawsome!
Think about that today and build someone up tomorrow by telling them they are beautiful. I guarantee you will be the one who smiles first.
Make today the best day of your life!
Sunday, April 9, 2017
I was sitting in church this morning and I noticed my Little Love just like I do every time I am at church. He is 2 years old and exceptionally smart and intuitive and quite the conversationalist at such a young age. When I caught sight of him, he was being held by his grandmother. A few minutes later his little hand was waving to his second set of grandparents sitting behind him further over in the balcony. Then he looked down to me and waved and blew kisses. Then he looked at some other folks in the balcony and waved to them. He said hello to the folks sitting right behind him. At two years old, he greeted his village.
As I considered what I had witnessed at church this morning, my mind reflected on how this tiny little human knows who his Village is. He knows who he can count on, depend on, seek counsel from, give and receive love from, who he can go to when he feels like he needs to talk. It's important to have people aside from immediate family that support you and give sound direction. At 2 years old he knows who his Village is. His parents have surrounded him with people who they know will uphold the family values as their child grows up.
Several people who were my Village growing up are still mentors who I feel I can go to if I need sound direction. As parents, we need to ensure that we expose our children to as many people as possible who will sustain and support the teachings we do within our household and will guide our children in the direction they should go. If there is ever a time that our child feels they can't tell their parents something then they have a Village already established that will gladly take them for ice cream and listen.
The people in our Village are anchors. Weights that keep us steady when winds blow. Dependable. People we know will be there when we need them. There actually are people around who don't have a Village. I challenge us all to step out of our comfort zone and become a Villager to someone without a Village. Everyone needs someone. Not to be all up in their business but just to be there.
I know one way we can be a Villager. Don't change your facial expressions no matter what has been confided to you. We are all one bad decision away from doom so it is asinine for us to judge someone else for their decisions. If you can say to yourself "that will never happen to me" then I fear for you. You are living in a fairy tale land and are trying to project perfection when truth is we are all imperfect beings in an imperfect world.
A two year old child knows who his Village is. Who is your Village? Who are you a Villager for?
Enjoy this beautiful day and give me your feedback on my post!